Ukrainian Orthodoxy		Orthodoxie ukrainienne

Mixed Marriage

Question:

My son is going to be married in the Ukrainian Orthodox Church (under the Moscow Patriarch) in Kiev this summer.  He is Roman Catholic.  It is my understanding the Ukrainian Church is in communion with Rome and no conversion will be necessary for either of them.   My questions are concerning the wedding and also appropriate gifts.  I was considering give them an icon of the Wedding at Cana as a gift.  The only ones I can find online are “Greek Orthodox”.  Would this be appropriate, or is there someplace I can purchase Ukrainian Icons?   Also, my son will need to wear an Eastern Orthodox cross for the Sacrament of Matrimony; again is there something particular to the Ukrainian Rite that would make this cross different from any notated as “Eastern Orthodox”?  Lastly, as a practicing Roman Catholic, is there anything I should know about the ceremony/Mass ahead of time?

Response:

Dr. Alexander Roman alex.roman@unicorne.org

Roman Catholics can get married in the Orthodox Church to an Orthodox Christian, as can other Christians who are baptized with water and by the Trinitarian formula.  However, the Ukrainian Orthodox Church (irrespective of which Patriarch it is in communion with) is definitely NOT in communion with Rome.  The Ukrainian Greek-Catholic Church is and it has the outward Eastern forms and even a certain “Orthodox ethos,” but is certainly not in union with Orthodoxy.  I’m assuming your son’s future bride is Orthodox which is why they are going to be married in an Orthodox Church.  Once married in the Orthodox Church, your son and his new bride will be united in the bonds of Matrimony, but will belong to Churches that are estranged from one another and where attending Holy Communion together will be an impossibility unless your son joins the Orthodox Church. 

In terms of wedding gifts, the icon of the marriage at Cana is very thoughtful and appropriate.  A Greek Orthodox icon of such would be perfectly acceptable as is the Greek style of iconography.   

With respect to the Cross, unless your son is thinking of joining the Orthodox Church, he does not need to wear an Orthodox baptismal Cross.  Should his future bride offer him one, he may wear it, to be sure.  In any event, baptismal Crosses are never worn on top of one’s clothing (this is reserved to clergy only in the Eastern tradition) and so no one will see what kind of Cross he is wearing, or even if he is wearing one at all.  You may view Orthodox neck Crosses at:  www.easternchristiansupply.biz

Your son and future daughter-in-law will most likely receive the “Mystery of Crowning” during an Orthodox Divine Liturgy.  The Sacraments are called “Mysteries” in the East and they will be crowned with either myrtle crowns or metallic, decorated crowns during the ceremony.  In the East, marriage is celebrated as an actual “coronation,” much like that of a new sovereign!  And in the Orthodox Church, the priest/bishop is the minister of the sacrament/mystery while in the West, the man and the woman are the ministers.

The Divine Liturgy of Orthodoxy will be considerably longer than the Western Mass, for one thing.  If you like, you should Cross yourself as frequently as everyone else in Church.  Women are always expected to cover their heads in an Orthodox Church, and they are given coloured handkerchiefs to do so, if they don’t bring one along.

Orthodox Churches are decorated very ornately with icons, much use is made of incense, beautiful choral singing etc.  It will doubtless be a memorable experience for your entire family! 

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Ukrainian Orthodoxy - Українське Православ'я